she just - starts crying. just awful, exhausted, hiccupping sobs. she thuds her head against the barrier and cries, because she doesn't know what else to do. she's so tired. she's done something that is so absolutely, soul-wrenchingly out of her bounds of morality that she can't quite handle it, and she's still alive to deal with it.
being forgiven just feels a little like salt on the wound.]
It hurts to see her like this, even if he's used to it. Used to watching people be crushed under the weight of sacrifice outside of their control. But he still selfishly wants her to live.
So he just sits down next to the barrier, leaning against it.
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the noise she makes is like a growl, and then:]
Scared.
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Do you want to die?
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silence, and then, staggered, stuttering:]
I don't - I don't want you to.
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[ Not sure why he's saying this. ]
But I thought you wanted to. You looked so heartbroken in the memory I saw.
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[she hisses at that first part. her tail lashes angrily behind her.]
You need to live. [he can probably see her digging her nails into her thigh.]
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And you? You don't need to?
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[hiccups.]
You saw what I did to him.
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And you're going to hate yourself over the guilt of it. I'm sorry. But that doesn't mean you don't deserve to live.
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I'm sorry.
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I'm sorry, too. I wish I could help you.
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You helped enough. You caught me. I wanted it.
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Because you don't want to hurt anyone.
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I didn't. But I did. [she says, voice cracking.] He forgave me. For it. In the end.
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But he can imagine this easily. ]
Why do you think he did that?
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[she interrupts herself with a hysterical little giggle, her engine flaring.]
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You don't think it's because of your friendship? Because he knows how hard it is to live having killed someone?
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I didn't want it!
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Just looking at her. ]
Really?
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she doesn't say anything.]
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But he does look heartbroken for her. ]
It's okay to want to be forgiven, even if you don't think you deserve it.
[ He shakes his head. ]
I don't think you need it, because you didn't do anything wrong, but I'd forgive you too, even if they'd voted for you.
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she just - starts crying. just awful, exhausted, hiccupping sobs. she thuds her head against the barrier and cries, because she doesn't know what else to do. she's so tired. she's done something that is so absolutely, soul-wrenchingly out of her bounds of morality that she can't quite handle it, and she's still alive to deal with it.
being forgiven just feels a little like salt on the wound.]
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It hurts to see her like this, even if he's used to it. Used to watching people be crushed under the weight of sacrifice outside of their control. But he still selfishly wants her to live.
So he just sits down next to the barrier, leaning against it.
He doesn't say anything else. ]