[ He feels!! Stupid and gross... Feeling this vulnerable. ]
I know I didn't do great, but I wanted to give the other path something of a fighting chance.
[ It always has been and he had come to terms he can't force Suguru. He can't slot him back to how he used to be, but if he can warp the circumstances that forced Suguru's hand... If he can make an obvious choice become choices instead, maybe it'll be enough.
Thinking about what's out of his control and beyond his power leaves him feeling helpless, likewise awful, so he bonks his head against Suguru's shoulder. ]
It's still your choice and I'm not asking you to make it now.
[ Oh, he's explaining himself. Suguru's comment about him being manipulative might've landed too hard...
He glances down at Satoru's head, trying to sort out how he feels about it all. A future where he mows down an entire village of people (it'd be very easy), and where he kills his parents in cold blood.
He doesn't feel... justified or relieved, more like he can understand why he would. ]
Lately, I hate being at the school, and spending every moment that I'm not on a mission dreading being called for the next one. Or dreading that I'll get news that something happened to someone else. I really hate it.
... But I'm happy when I'm with you. You said it to me earlier, so I'm going to say it back: I could never hate you, Satoru. Not for real.
[ Satoru has been receptive to criticism and advice, knowing interpersonal handlings are out of his wheelhouse, even if it's picked up from his best friend verbally attacking him.
He stays quiet, keeping his head rested on him, and closes his eyes as he lets Suguru's voice lull him. These words—they aren't comforting. They aren't happy. There's a sweetness at the end, though bitter at the edges.
A whisper, it wasn't enough, but he keeps it to himself. He doesn't let it sway him. He doesn't let it control him. Suguru's words mean much more. So... He pouts like he usually does. ]
Mm. [ A pause as he realizes this is where he should offer reassurance. ] Thanks for telling me about how you feel.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
I know I didn't do great, but I wanted to give the other path something of a fighting chance.
[ It always has been and he had come to terms he can't force Suguru. He can't slot him back to how he used to be, but if he can warp the circumstances that forced Suguru's hand... If he can make an obvious choice become choices instead, maybe it'll be enough.
Thinking about what's out of his control and beyond his power leaves him feeling helpless, likewise awful, so he bonks his head against Suguru's shoulder. ]
It's still your choice and I'm not asking you to make it now.
no subject
He glances down at Satoru's head, trying to sort out how he feels about it all. A future where he mows down an entire village of people (it'd be very easy), and where he kills his parents in cold blood.
He doesn't feel... justified or relieved, more like he can understand why he would. ]
Lately, I hate being at the school, and spending every moment that I'm not on a mission dreading being called for the next one. Or dreading that I'll get news that something happened to someone else. I really hate it.
... But I'm happy when I'm with you. You said it to me earlier, so I'm going to say it back: I could never hate you, Satoru. Not for real.
no subject
He stays quiet, keeping his head rested on him, and closes his eyes as he lets Suguru's voice lull him. These words—they aren't comforting. They aren't happy. There's a sweetness at the end, though bitter at the edges.
A whisper, it wasn't enough, but he keeps it to himself. He doesn't let it sway him. He doesn't let it control him. Suguru's words mean much more. So... He pouts like he usually does. ]
Mm. [ A pause as he realizes this is where he should offer reassurance. ] Thanks for telling me about how you feel.
no subject
It's not affection week, but he briefly buries his face in Satoru's hair, taking a moment to appreciate the effort he's making.
He pulls away after a moment, Straightening up before nudging Satoru to rest his head on his leg so that he can play with his hair. Cozy. ]
no subject
I'm tired.
[ Is it time for a nappy... A real nap. ]
no subject
Sleep for a bit.
no subject
[ He will take a solid nap and Suguru is stuck here. Ishtar dies. ]